It's always a little amusing and a little scary to poke through some old document files and come across weird old fragments of writing or old random flotsam one had almost -- almost! -- forgotten one had written.
I looked at this old file, a silly thing by the Marquis and I. As I recall, we concocted it during some 3 am online chat, circa 1994, each of us taking turns supplying a line for each of the twelve "gifts."
1994? My god, this thing is 10 years old. Time moveths.
Here it is:
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The Marquis's intro:
Late last night, I had the extreme pleasure to find Mme. Bat online, and due perhaps to sleep deprivation on both sides, we came up with the proposed holiday in celebration of "Gothmas," which is a holiday perhaps best celebrated on July 14th, Bastille Day -- a day when Goth's the world over take to the streets in their tattered Victorian best with severed heads on sticks, roaming from house to house, "Caroling" the following song:
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(sung roughly to the tune of 12 Days of Xmas, but dropped to the key of D-minor [the saddest key] and accompanied by dissonant church bells four miles off, over that windy hill just there -- yah, that one -- with the lone oak.)
THE TWELVE DAYS OF GOTHMAS
On the first day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the second day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the third day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the fourth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the fifth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the sixth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the seventh day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Seven Manic Panics
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the eighth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Eight Goths a-leaping
Seven Manic Panics
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the nineth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Nine Muni Tokens
Eight Goths a-leaping
Seven Manic Panics
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the tenth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Ten ripped up fishnets
Nine Muni Tokens
Eight Goths a-leaping
Seven Manic Panics
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the eleventh day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Eleven Goths a-weeping
Ten ripped up fishnets
Nine Muni Tokens
Eight Goths a-leaping
Seven Manic Panics
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
And some glue, in a Goth tree.
On the twelfth day of Gothmas, my ex-love gave to me
Twelve days to live
Eleven Goths a-weeping
Ten ripped up fishnets
Nine Muni Tokens
Eight Goths a-leaping
Seven Manic Panics
Six bags of Sun-Chips
Fiiiiive Currrrrre Seeee-Deeeeeeeee's
Four mouldy dishes
Three parking tickets
Two strains of herpes
[big finish!]
And some gluuuuuuuuuuuuue, in a Gohhhhhhhth treeeeeeeeeeee.
(Chromatic dissention, decrescendo, to a dark, hauntingly beautiful fluttering of D-minor in the base keys. The church bell rings a mournful, nonsensical C#. All is lost. Carpe nocturne.)
